Hello and welcome to the Monday Morning Marketing Podcast. I'm Esther.
And I'm Melanie.
And today we're talking about why imposter syndrome hampers your marketing. So first off, what is imposter posture syndrome? I'm not looking at dictionary definition here or anything, but what is your definition of imposter syndrome?
Well, for me, my definition of imposter syndrome is you feel highly incapable of saying how good you are or what you're proficient at or even if you have any real knowledge in a specific area that's to do with your business.
Yeah. Because you always feel like there's somebody else out there who knows more and who is better at doing it than you are. But maybe they're just faking it. Did you ever consider that?
Well, there is that. I mean, some people suggest faking it till you make it is a way forward. And I think to a certain extent, maybe that is a good thing. But the downside is, especially in the field of social media, is you can get caught out very quickly. Your social media footprint is there for everybody to see. So you can get very quickly found out.
I feel, yeah, imposter syndrome is real. It's a real thing. I've had it. You've had it. We know lots of people who have had it. And it does make you feel really debilitated. It takes away the power that you have and takes away your voice because you just don't feel like you are the person who is qualified to talk about that topic or talk about that thing or, you know, run those social media accounts. And we're talking about it in the context of marketing. It can make you feel that you don't actually know your business as well as you think you know your business, because it could have started from a snide comment from a competitor by, oh, well, I wouldn't have done it that way or it could be something that somebody else says, no, but why do you do it that way?
It doesn't even need to be words. It can just be an emoji you see on a post or on an ad that you put out and you're like, oh, well, I wasn't expecting to get that response.
No, it catches you unawares. But then it makes you feel that you really start to question everything. Everything that you have done in what yours is eight years, almost nine years. Mine is seven years that we've been running the business. We know our stuff. Let's be honest here. We know what we're talking about here. But it does make you question everything, because then you just sort of go, well, that's how I thought. And that's what I thought. And is that not what it is or you've got these ones, you know, like, I have a degree, other people don't have degrees doesn't really matter in this day and age. But it does make you question sometimes, like, do I know what I'm talking about? And the answer is yes. I want to tell you now. The answer is yes. You do know what you're talking about. Nobody knows your business better than you. So how can we get over ourselves and get over the imposter syndrome? Because it's not just something that happens. Maybe once, right?
No, you're absolutely right. Imposter syndrome can start and finish all the way from when you start your business to if, heck, even nine years later, I've got you, and I've got a mutual friend who I won't name because I don't want to embarrass them, but they are literally just starting their business, like in the last year or so. And it's so funny because I can hear them saying, oh, I've been looking at the post for this person, somebody else we know who's more established than both of us. And I just can't imagine being that well known, that popular, that people understanding who I am and what I do. And then they speak to me, and I know they speak to you as well. And they're like, oh, this is just hard to imagine this is ever going to be me. And how am I going to do this? How am I going to reach the same dizzy heights you have? And I'm thinking, I'm at dizzy Heights. Me? And it's weird because we're all at such different stages.
Yeah.
And we don't mean to look at one another and measure ourselves by each other. Nobody's going out intentionally doing that.
No, but it's human nature.
But we do.
Yeah, it's completely normal human nature.
Just the mere fact that I know I can be found in lots of different places with podcasts, photos, videos, lives, as well as lots of blogs doesn't mean I'm actually doing very well. It just means I'm really good at getting my name and my brand in lots of different places. I'm not the same staggering dizzy heights as Kim Garst and Mari Smith.
No, to be fair, no, but maybe some of our listeners have never heard of them either.
No, that's true.
Just because they're well known to you and I, because we've seen them speak at events and we follow them online doesn't mean that other people do.
True.
You know, other people are following you and I. Other names that we mention might not be as well known because they're not on that other person's radar. They're not on every single person's radar, because at the end of the day, you cannot market to everyone and be everyone's cup of tea. You have your niche. And we've talked about this until we're blue in the face. You have your market, you have your niche. You have the people that you market to, and there are markets out there that have famous people with millions and millions of followers that you and I have never heard of because we're not their audience, but they are way more famous maybe, than the people that we might know. But just because your next door neighbour might not know exactly what you do does not mean that you're not good at what you do. My mum and dad still have no clue what I do. They don't. I mean, "Esther works in something with computers" is what my dad says to people, and they don't have a clue. But they're still they're telling people that "if you have a problem with your computer, talk to Esther." I do not fix computers, by the way. I don't. But they understand enough to know that they can send people to me if they need a new website or if they if they haven't a clue what to do on Facebook, then, oh, "talk to my daughter. She does something with computers." But just because you don't register on everyone's radar does not mean that you're not good at what you do.
So how do we help ourselves and our audience overcome imposter syndrome? And I think probably one of the first things I would strongly suggest you do is write down what you love about what you do. Write down what you love about what you do and really work on that more than anything else. Because sometimes the imposter syndrome comes from doing the stuff that you're not that good at, that you're not that familiar with.
Yeah. But you accept it because somebody asked you and you're just starting out and you needed the money, the injection of cash. You needed to say yes to this client because you're hoping for more things of what you do like to do from there.
Exactly.
But you can get stuck in a rut.
It's where it starts for a lot of people is that element. And other times it could be you've made a mistake. You have made either a small or a big mistake. And that can be either at an event or you've trained somebody and it's not going well or you've learnt something yourself and you haven't done it properly. And you know what? In the nearly nine years that I've been in business, I have made some whoppers, some public ones, not many, but I've made them and I'm still here.
Yeah. I mean, you can get over them like everybody makes mistakes. And again, it's human nature. It's part of what we are. It's part of who we are. But owning up to the mistakes and saying, yes, that was me holding your hands up and saying, I messed up. I misread the information. I sent the ad to the wrong audience. My bad. But learn from them and move on. Another thing I would say would be stop looking at the competition. Just ignore what they're doing and what they're saying, especially if they've been in business for ten years and you're only starting they'll have lots more things to share out on their social media, because they've written lots more blogs than you, because they have appeared on more podcasts than you, because they have become a household name in that sector of their business. So try to find other people that are just starting out like you. And it'll make you feel better about yourself because you're all in the same boat. Rather than looking at one person who's in a big massive yacht and you're just in a wee rowboat, you'll get to the yacht, you will.
Yeah, that's great advice. Getting accountability partner is the same place as you is much better, much more suitable, because it's very difficult to keep up with somebody who's got maybe more money staff. It's just not possible.
Yeah, but use them as a mentor, as a mentor rather than accountability buddy.
But, you know, accountability buddies are one thing. But I also think it's important to surround yourself by the right kind of people. If you would go to that person about a personal issue in your own life not to do with your business and appreciate and enjoy their feedback, then that's the right type of person you want to be around. But if you will only approach this person as a mentor. Okay. Then already you're not on the same ground.
No.
Okay. You need to be surrounded by people who get you and not just your business. I'm been so lucky.
Yeah, you have me.
Yeah. I've been so lucky because of the communities that I'm part of and some of the private Facebook conversations in messenger that I've been surrounded by such a lovely bunch of women. I've got one of my girlfriends back from where I used to live in County Wicklow. And they're just friends. They're not nothing to do with my business. And then I've got another group which is called the Social Girls, because we're all into social of some description. And I'm just so damn lucky to have those two groups because we've gone all the way through covid and parenting and life, marriage, life in general. And because of them, I'm still in business. Yeah.
Because they can talk you down from a ledge as well. Not a literal ledge, but a metaphorical ledge of, "oh, I'm no good. Oh, I did this. Oh, I messed up."
And we've all done it for each other.
Yeah, we have. I mean, I've talked to you about stuff and you've talked to me and just having that person to talk to, whether it be like Melanie says, just a normal friend that is not in your same business or somebody who's in the same sector as you. But they've all been there and done that to a certain level.
Yeah.
And a lot of people I read recently that a lot of people think that impostor syndrome is more a woman's thing. Like a lot more women would have impostor syndrome. It's not true. A lot of men answered that comment or that post that I saw and says, "I've been there, done that." But I think men are more they're not as vocal about it. They would be the more "fake it till you make it" to get through imposter syndrome type but not all of them either. I mean there's lots of women that I would know that would be "fake it till you make it." Everything's fine, everything's grand and they're really struggling inside because of their imposter syndrome but find that person or those people those groups that you can relate to and that can relate to you and you will make it out the other side we promise and you'll probably end up back in it again like we said because we've been through it multiple times. Who am I to be standing up on stage with XYZ person? Who am I to be running an event? You are you and you have your experience and you have your knowledge and you have your contacts and that's why you're the right person for it.
I still pinch myself that I'm on the same speaker list as some of the people I've been listed against in the last couple of years. Unbelievable. People that I've admired and watched for years before I really kicked off properly and you kind of pinch yourself, don't you? That you're on the same list as these guys but you know, nobody made it overnight. Nobody made it overnight
No there's no quick fix there's no magic potion we've all been there all done it all gone through it so you know, find your people, find your group, find your tribe whatever you want to call them and you will make it through to the other side as well.
Yeah and guys, no matter what that little voice is telling you never ever give up.
Exactly.
Never ever give up.
That's it for today, guys. We hope you enjoyed the episode we hope that you will reach out if you need help or advice and you can find us on all our social media on our website, www.themondaymorningmarketing.com. You can send us a little message through there and we will happily answer any of your questions. So until next time guys have a good one and stay safe.
Bye for now.
Bye bye.